It’s taken some time – slow and meaningful – to decide what I want 2017 to look like. In previous years, my goals have included reading more books, documenting our memories with the Project Life App and other not so important things. While I still want to do all the things that make me happy, like reading books and scrapbooking, I want this year to be different. I want a slower way of living. I don’t want to live frantically; marking items off my to do list.
As I pondered what my priories will be in 2017, these five areas took precedence.
We live in a world that says we have to be and do everything. I’m guilty of believing I have to do something (other than be Jackson’s mama) to prove my worth. The other day I was having a little pity party. I was sharing my heart with John and he said words that were a balm to my weary soul.
I know you want to do more. I know you want to write and take photos. You’re really good at that. But that little boy in there thinks the world of you. He is so happy, because of you. He’s come so far, because of all the hard work you’ve put in. When will you realize that being his mom is the most important thing you’ll ever do? When will you realize that if that’s all you ever accomplish it will be enough?
Motherhood isn’t always glamourous. Actually, it’s pretty mundane and messy.
But there is magic in the mundane and I don’t want to miss it.
This year I want to embrace motherhood.
I want to believe that the unseen and often mundane moments really do matter in a big way.
Pursue My Photography Passion
I’m not looking to build a big business or to make a bunch of money. I don’t want to find my value and worth in something other than Christ. But I really want to continue the little photography business I started last Fall.
I want to take photos because I love taking photos.
There is nothing better than capturing memories. There is nothing better than realizing you got the perfect shot. I love giving people photos that make them smile. Photos they can look back on for years to come. I am happy behind a camera. I want to do more of what makes me happy, simply because it makes me happy.
Write Because I Love It; Not to Find My Worth
Reading Present Over Perfect was just what my heart needed at the start of a new year. I have no doubt I’ll go back and reread the pages. I scribbled a thousand notes. Reading each page was an eye opening/soul searching journey.
Shauna’s words were words I could have written myself.
I saw my heart on the pages of that book:
She writes, My love for reading remains, but my desire to write is waning…and I wonder sometimes if it’s because writing has become – or maybe always was – a way of proving myself, defining myself, articulating something about my identify and worth….Why do it? Because writing has become my love letter, my way of telling the love story that’s changed my life.
What fuels me now is love!
2017 will look different – I feel Him asking me to surrender my writing – to be fueled by love. Not competition or comparison. To write because I love words and it’s how He created me; not to find my worth. My writing is an offering; not an idol. He’s asking me to trust Him with the outcome.
Become Intentional Again
My relationship with God suffered last year. I spent all of 2015 being intentional with that relationship and it grew deeper and more meaningful. The fruits of spending time with Jesus each day trickled into every other area of my life. I felt peace, joy, hope and contentment. I wasn’t as intentional in 2016, and I saw the effects: less joy, more days when I felt depressed, anger and bitterness. I pretty much spent the last few months of 2016 giving God the silent treatment.
I’m going to do things the way I did in 2015.
I liked that girl so much better.
A few years ago I counted gifts until I reached a thousand and my joy increased my leaps and bounds.
I learned that when you stop practicing gratitude you grow immune to His glory around you.
I want to witness His glory, because it’s waiting to be discovered in the midst of the mess; in the most mundane moments of motherhood!
Gratitude enables us to see glory in the ordinary.
This year I will count gifts once again – I will take my focus off the mess and the stress – and give thanks.
I want to live intentionally grateful.